The quadcopter is the Bitcraze Crazy Flie. When I was finally able to connect to it, the quadcopter had more lift on the right hand side, flipping the quadcopter over every time we increased the throttle. I was never able to get the thing into the air.
But wait, there's more!
1. The software is terribly finicky - Over the past 4 computers I've tried the software on, only one worked.
2. The driver cannot be installed on Windows 8! I've followed the instructions without success - the driver installer complains that the driver does not have a proper signature and does not provide an override button.
3. The quadcopter. After trying a couple times to fly it, it started shutting down mid process until it finally stopped turning on.
Photos:
http://imgur.com/a/46fwQ